Stay the Hell Out of Arizona Bars
It is now legal for people to bring their guns into bars and restaurants in Arizona unless a sign has been posted specifically stating otherwise. Those carrying guns are not allowed to drink alcohol, though. Right. They’re going to go to a bar and order what, a soda? I don’t think so. Those bringing a gun into an establishment that has a sign posted banning weapons will be slapped with a big old misdemeanor which carries the harsh penalty of up to 30 days in jail and a fine of up to $500. However, a person is exempt from punishment if: 1) the sign banning weapons had fallen down, 2) the person bringing the gun into the establishment isn’t an Arizona resident, and 3) the sign banning weapons was posted for the first time less than a month earlier.
What a fucking crock! There are so many things wrong with those exemptions it’s pathetic. First, you can just rip the damn sign down, bring your gun into the bar, and then when arrested say the sign wasn’t up. Bingo, you’re free! I mean, really, how are they going to prove that the sign was up when you entered the bar? Unless they have a picture or video of each person entering the establishment there’s no way to prove that sign was up when you entered.
And non-Arizona residents not having to abide by this law…seriously? So if I travel to Arizona maybe I can break all of the other laws too. I can drive over the speed limit, maybe help myself to some free snacks from the convenience store, perhaps steal someone’s car because it’s better than mine. Of course, I would expect to get off scott free since I don’t live in Arizona. Hey, if I don’t have to abide by one law why should I have to abide by any?
And lastly, and this one might be my favorite exemption, you can get away with bringing your gun into the bar if the bar had posted their sign banning weapons less than a month ago. Seriously?!? What’s the point of that? So let’s say a bar owner was letting idiots with guns into his bar. One day there’s a problem with a drunken idiot waving a gun around (because as previously stated, you’re not going into a bar to drink soda or water) and the owner decides he doesn’t want any more problems so he posts a sign banning weapons from his bar. Well, a week later some jackass brings a gun into his bar and is allowed to get off with no punishment whatsoever because the sign has only been up for a week. What a bunch of B.S.!!! It shouldn’t matter when the sign was posted, as long as it was posted before the bar or restaurant opened for business for the day.
Seriously, the level of stupidity is just astounding!
Where Did My Spoon Go?
For the past two years John Manley has been coughing, vomiting, and in pain. The source of his ill health was just recently found when a doctor did an endoscopy. You’ll never guess the cause of his problems. The doctor found a piece of a plastic spoon from Wendy’s in his lung. Yep, that’s right. The man swallowed a piece of a plastic spoon and it somehow ended up in his lung. A piece big enough where the doctor could plainly read “Wendy’s” on one side of the handle and “hamburgers” on the other side.
Now it’s pretty clear to anybody with a brain that the only way the piece of spoon could get in his lung is by trying to swallow it. However, Manley says, “I know I didn’t chow down on a spoon! It must have been in the food or drink.” Ok, now let’s think this one through. If you’re drinking something with a piece of a spoon in it you’re going to notice it when it hits your mouth. Or at the very least when you swallow. And if you’re eating something with a piece of a spoon in it you’re going to notice that as well. Remember, the piece of spoon was decent sized. So for this guy to claim he has no recollection of this is just astounding. And not very believable either. Unless he was drunk or high. I’m just waiting for the lawsuit to be filed against Wendy’s now. Moron.
Repeat Drunk Driver Gets Life
Bravo! The Canadians certainly have it right. Roger Walsh has been sentenced to life in prison after hitting and killing a woman while he was drunk. This was his 19th alcohol-related conviction! The judge said the idiot would more than likely commit further crimes, so he made sure that would not be allowed to happen. This total waste of space has 114 total previous convictions for crimes such as breaking and entering, theft, assault, and uttering threats. That’s in addition to the 19 alcohol-related convictions. What an upstanding citizen! This is the first time a life sentence has been handed down in Canada for a drunk driving conviction. Here’s hoping it’s the first of many more. And maybe the judges in this country can take note of our northern neighbors. We sure as hell could use sentences like that here.
Idiot Slaps Crying Child
Roger Stephens, an idiot shopping at a Walmart in Georgia, was none too happy with a crying toddler so he approached the mother and told her, “If you don’t shut the baby up, I will shut her up for you.” Nice guy. Real nice. The toddler continued crying, and when they were in another aisle the loser grabbed the child and slapped her across her face – four or five times. Then he said to the mother, “See, I told you I would shut her up.” He then apparently apologized to the mother before he was arrested. He’s being charged with first-degree cruelty to children.
What a piece of work! If that was my child he had done that too I would have kicked the shit out of him. You do not lay a hand on a stranger’s child. Seriously, what in the hell was this idiot thinking? I cannot fathom somebody going up to a complete stranger and slapping their child. I just can’t wrap my mind around it. We all get annoyed by crying children in public places such as restaurants or stores, but under no circumstances do you behave like a complete buffoon! If the crying bothers you that much then leave. That’s what most of us sane people do. I have the perfect punishment for him once he’s convicted of this reprehensible behavior. I think he should be locked in a room with a bunch of screaming children for a few hours. Of course he’d be restrained so he couldn’t lay a hand on another child. Ah, sweet justice.
What’s Good for the Goose…
So the wonderful bureaucrats in the pathetic state of Taxachusetts screwed us all by raising the sales tax a whopping 25% and adding the tax to alcohol now. They obviously expected us to bend over and take it. Well, many people are now crossing state borders to do their shopping in bordering states. No surprise there. However, it is surprising to find out that one of those idiot politicians who voted to screw the citizens of this state with the tax increase and tax on alcohol was seen purchasing alcohol in New Hampshire.
That’s right. Michael Rodrigues thought it was such a wonderful idea for the people of Massachusetts to be taxed up the ass, but apparently he didn’t like the idea of being screwed over himself though. He was seen piling alcohol into his car with its State House license plate in tax free New Hampshire. Umm, excuse me. If the people of this state are expected to pay this ridiculous tax then what the hell makes this moron so special that he thinks it’s ok to circumvent paying the taxes? Oh, I see. It’s ok for us little people to have to pay, but apparently there’s a separate set of rules for the idiots who make the laws. I guess that’s nothing new. However, if you’re going to jump the border to avoid paying taxes that you voted to increase, you might want to think about taking a less conspicuous vehicle. I mean, come on. Driving your car with the State House plates? Fucking moron! Oh, and you’re a fucking hypocrite, too! Hopefully the people in your district will vote you the hell out of office.
Taxachusetts is at it Again
It’s quite apparent to most of us living in this awful state that it’s getting harder and harder to live here. That’s why the population in this crappy state is declining, which, by the way, is going to cost this state some seats in the House when they redo the numbers. On August 1st the sales tax in this state skyrocketed from 5% to 6.25%. That in itself was a bad move as it’s driven citizens of MA to surrounding states and also online to do a lot of their shopping. Then the morons in power announced that there would be no tax holiday this year. Big mistake as surrounding states are still holding theirs. In fact, Connecticut has a tax free week, not just two days like we’ve had in the past. And now, as if the idiots haven’t done enough to take business away from MA retailers, they’ve given yet another “fuck you” to those poor retailers.
Since there is no tax holiday this year many retailers were advertising that they would pay the sales tax on certain days. Sounds good, right? The consumers still get to buy things this year without paying tax, and the tax still gets paid. In fact, it’s a much better deal for the state than past tax holidays since the state would actually see the tax revenue. So, like most bureaucrats do when something good comes along, they squashed this. In this god forsaken state it’s apparently illegal for retailers to pay sales tax for consumers. Seriously, that’s way beyond fucked up! Who the hell cares who pays the damn sales tax as long as it’s paid. It’s past time that these idiots in power dig their heads out of their collective asses. Pretty soon there won’t be anyone left in this rotten state for them to screw over. Will the last person leaving Taxachusetts please turn off the light?
Bathing Suit? I Don’t Think So
A Muslim woman in France is crying religious discrimination because she was not allowed to go swimming while fully clothed. France has strict regulations when it comes to swimming in public pools. Swimmers are not allowed to wear baggy clothing or street clothes, such as bermuda shorts. They must wear tight, figure-fitting suits. Women must wear swimsuits and men must wear swimming briefs. Everyone must wear a cap to cover their hair, and everyone also has to shower before entering the pool.
After reading about the regulations there is no doubt whatsoever that this idiot’s claim is completely baseless. While she claims to have been wearing a swimsuit, the head to toe clothes she was wearing clearly does not meet France’s specification for a swimsuit. It’s no different than a man showing up at the pool with baggy swimming trunks and being turned away. The woman went so far as to try to file a complaint with the local police, but she was turned away because her complaint of discrimination was groundless. You think?
Here’s a novel idea. Get your own damn pool where you can swim fully clothed till your heart’s content. Until then, if you can’t follow the rules then stay home. And stop your pathetic whining. Nobody likes a whiner.
Don’t Yawn in Court
Clifton Williams, of Richton Park, Illinois, is facing six months in jail for yawning in court while observing his cousin’s sentencing. Judge Daniel Rozak didn’t like the yawn-like sound that came from Williams so he found him to be in contempt of court and sentenced him to six months in jail. Williams has a status hearing coming up, and it’s possible that he could be released from jail if he apologizes and the judge accepts it. By the time of his hearing he’ll have been in jail for 21 days.
This punishment seems to be a tad harsh. The guy yawned in court. I dont’ give a rat’s ass if he yawned loudly – that’s absolutely no reason to sentence him to any jail time whatsoever. He should have been given a warning if the judge didn’t appreciate the yawn, and then if he did it again he could have been held in contempt. This judge, like many others, seems to have an ego much larger than life. God forbid you yawn in his courtroom. I wonder how much jail time you’d have to serve for sneezing?
What Else Have You Got in There?
Here’s something you don’t hear every day. George Vera, a rather obese 500-pound man in Texas, was arrested for selling illegal copies of CDs. Police searched him when they arrested him, and he was searched again at a city jail and a county jail. They all missed something though. During a shower break Vera informed officials that he had an unloaded 9mm pistol hidden in his rolls of fat. Yep, you read that right. He had a gun hidden in his rolls of fat.
As much as I think that the gun should have been found during the searches, I can kind of understand why it wasn’t. I mean, come on, would you really want to lift up each and every roll of fat on someone while searching them? I wouldn’t. Of course, it’s not my job to do so, so I don’t have to worry about that. I feel bad for anybody in that position that has to do so. That’s a really nasty job.
Nothing Stands in the Way of His Beer
Dennis Cretton does not have a valid driver’s license. It was revoked because of a DUI conviction. But that didn’t stop him from driving to a gas station for more beer – while drunk. He apparently figured that it would ok to drive his riding lawnmower to get more beer. He was arrested and charged with felony aggravated driving under the influence.
Seriously, I can’t help but laugh at this. There’s nothing funny about drunk driving. That’s not what’s funny. What makes me laugh is picturing some dumbass driving his riding lawnmower down the street. I mean, come on, that’s something you see on TV, not in real life. I wonder what went through the minds of the people that saw him. And can you imagine the look on the clerk’s face as he sees some idiot pull up on his riding lawnmower and come into the store for beer? Seriously, if I was driving and saw that I’d have to pull over until I was able to contain the laughter and compose myself. And how drunk do you have to be to think it’s ok to drive your riding lawnmower to the store for beer?
