Archive for September, 2009

Where Did My Spoon Go?

Posted: September 23, 2009 in Uncategorized

For the past two years John Manley has been coughing, vomiting, and in pain.  The source of his ill health was just recently found when a doctor did an endoscopy.  You’ll never guess the cause of his problems.  The doctor found a piece of a plastic spoon from Wendy’s in his lung.  Yep, that’s right.  The man swallowed a piece of a plastic spoon and it somehow ended up in his lung.  A piece big enough where the doctor could plainly read “Wendy’s” on one side of the handle and “hamburgers” on the other side.

Now it’s pretty clear to anybody with a brain that the only way the piece of spoon could get in his lung is by trying to swallow it. However, Manley says, “I know I didn’t chow down on a spoon! It must have been in the food or drink.” Ok, now let’s think this one through. If you’re drinking something with a piece of a spoon in it you’re going to notice it when it hits your mouth. Or at the very least when you swallow. And if you’re eating something with a piece of a spoon in it you’re going to notice that as well. Remember, the piece of spoon was decent sized. So for this guy to claim he has no recollection of this is just astounding. And not very believable either. Unless he was drunk or high. I’m just waiting for the lawsuit to be filed against Wendy’s now.  Moron.

Repeat Drunk Driver Gets Life

Posted: September 10, 2009 in Uncategorized

Bravo!  The Canadians certainly have it right.  Roger Walsh has been sentenced to life in prison after hitting and killing a woman while he was drunk.  This was his 19th alcohol-related conviction! The judge said the idiot would more than likely commit further crimes, so he made sure that would not be allowed to happen. This total waste of space has 114 total previous convictions for crimes such as breaking and entering, theft, assault, and uttering threats. That’s in addition to the 19 alcohol-related convictions. What an upstanding citizen! This is the first time a life sentence has been handed down in Canada for a drunk driving conviction. Here’s hoping it’s the first of many more. And maybe the judges in this country can take note of our northern neighbors. We sure as hell could use sentences like that here.

Idiot Slaps Crying Child

Posted: September 8, 2009 in Uncategorized

Roger Stephens, an idiot shopping at a Walmart in Georgia, was none too happy with a crying toddler so he approached the mother and told her, “If you don’t shut the baby up, I will shut her up for you.” Nice guy. Real nice. The toddler continued crying, and when they were in another aisle the loser grabbed the child and slapped her across her face – four or five times. Then he said to the mother, “See, I told you I would shut her up.” He then apparently apologized to the mother before he was arrested. He’s being charged with first-degree cruelty to children.

What a piece of work! If that was my child he had done that too I would have kicked the shit out of him. You do not lay a hand on a stranger’s child. Seriously, what in the hell was this idiot thinking? I cannot fathom somebody going up to a complete stranger and slapping their child. I just can’t wrap my mind around it. We all get annoyed by crying children in public places such as restaurants or stores, but under no circumstances do you behave like a complete buffoon! If the crying bothers you that much then leave. That’s what most of us sane people do. I have the perfect punishment for him once he’s convicted of this reprehensible behavior. I think he should be locked in a room with a bunch of screaming children for a few hours. Of course he’d be restrained so he couldn’t lay a hand on another child. Ah, sweet justice.

What’s Good for the Goose…

Posted: September 3, 2009 in Uncategorized

So the wonderful bureaucrats in the pathetic state of Taxachusetts screwed us all by raising the sales tax a whopping 25% and adding the tax to alcohol now. They obviously expected us to bend over and take it. Well, many people are now crossing state borders to do their shopping in bordering states. No surprise there. However, it is surprising to find out that one of those idiot politicians who voted to screw the citizens of this state with the tax increase and tax on alcohol was seen purchasing alcohol in New Hampshire.

That’s right. Michael Rodrigues thought it was such a wonderful idea for the people of Massachusetts to be taxed up the ass, but apparently he didn’t like the idea of being screwed over himself though. He was seen piling alcohol into his car with its State House license plate in tax free New Hampshire. Umm, excuse me. If the people of this state are expected to pay this ridiculous tax then what the hell makes this moron so special that he thinks it’s ok to circumvent paying the taxes? Oh, I see. It’s ok for us little people to have to pay, but apparently there’s a separate set of rules for the idiots who make the laws. I guess that’s nothing new. However, if you’re going to jump the border to avoid paying taxes that you voted to increase, you might want to think about taking a less conspicuous vehicle. I mean, come on. Driving your car with the State House plates? Fucking moron! Oh, and you’re a fucking hypocrite, too! Hopefully the people in your district will vote you the hell out of office.